Do you believe that healing is an ongoing process, or a singular destination you only visit once?
In my practice, I frequently find myself reminding clients that things come in waves, and the healing process never really ends. I wanted to talk about this concept today because I really believe that life gets easier when we stop fighting things and stay in the flow.
A big part of why I encourage embracing the idea of healing being a journey is because people should be changing with life. No single human is meant to be the same exact person from their younger years to the last years of their life. Like many things in life, people should live within cycles, shedding the old and blossoming into something new. It’s the same concept with the healing journey.
Healing is often healing trauma. It can also be finding healing by being more yourself and less of what other people want you to be. The healing journey is really about living a life that is authentic to you.
We often get caught up in getting to a singular place. Feeling emotions once, but not returning to them. Maybe going to therapy just a few times and thinking you’re good with the coping methods you’re taught. Or, maybe we do process things and hope it’ll never come up again.
There are things in our life, especially healing from trauma, where we feel like we’ve done the work, and that we’ll never have it come up again. Here’s where we need to go with the flow. It’s very rare to find total healing. Things you thought healed might come up again in a year, or ten years, at any moment really.
There’s a reason for this, and it’s because we are meant to change over the years. As we change and grow and become a new version of ourselves- we see things a different way. We can process things differently, and for a lot of people focused on the healing journey, they get better over the years at doing the right thing for them. They believe in themselves more. That makes it easier to uncover new layers of what needs to heal. We’re frequently less afraid because we’ve done it before.
It’s a real glitch in the healing process when you assume there’s a singular destination you only have to visit once. As much as we may sometimes wish we could go to healing island or healing mountain once, it’s simply not how things work. When you live with this belief that you only have to take care of things once, what you’re really doing is burying things deep down and refusing to let them flow. What we bury, stagnates, and what stagnates, hurts us.
What we refuse to face controls us, and thinking we control the healing process by dealing with things once is detrimental to the beauty of the life we have.
So, in this healing process, enjoy the journey.
Let things flow.